aesthetically challenged

The theme of todays post is "aesthetics". This is one of those words that I came across in college and continued to use until I knew what it really meant. You see I thought that it was a great word for describing something beyond what we call "beauty", but then I just found out that it was a way of appreciating or interpretating beauty (but then again, maybe I still don't know exactly what it means and therefore and stopped using it because a. It's not what I really thought it was or b. I don't know what the hell it means). Anyway now that I have confessed my ignorance I am going to go about the rest of this post as though I didn't. Ignorance is bliss, and really all that I have at this point.
So now that November is here and soon you lucky bastards will all have a mouthful of turkey while I'm here sucking on chicken twisters (which honestly are quite delicious) I thought that I would do my best to make you slightly jealous of my lavish, yet turkeyless, existence. I shall begin with exhibit A: autumn leaf viewing. Now some of you may think, "well yes Danny boy, autumn leaves are quite nice, but I often only enjoy them from my couch or car window". Well my friends have I got a tradition to share with you: in Mother Russia...oh wait, in the Great Nihon they make an all day trip out of the event. And it isn't simply walking through a park on a nice sunny autumn noon, but it is a whole experience complete with vendors lining your path selling all kinds of crap! There are trinket stands, fall food stands, sausage stands, sweet potato stands, standing stands, you get the point. It was crazy. Honestly, I thought that it was just going to be a nice little walk in some mountainous area. But no. We had to deal with a lot of families and old folks. But all of the difficulties were all made up for when the monkeys arrived. Oh I'm not a talkin' about no British invasion or circus act, I'm talkin' about some real live monkeys just hangin' out...monkeys, hangin' out...always gets a giggle out of me. Back to the monkeys though. So they were just relaxin' in trees and eating little kids that wondered too far from the pack. It really felt like I had truly gone back to nature. Except for all the stands...but they were traditional stands, and Japanese tradition goes back like a lot longer then Caucasion tradition...so essentially I was going back to when my people were in the muck and poo of nature, it's just that this time I'm in a more developed part of the world. NO I'm not turning Japanese; just making a point.
So anyways, back to the monkees...everytime I go to Karaoke I have to sing "Day Dream Believer", no really, they make me or else they ask me to leave.
So anyways, back to the mokeys...my students told me that the mokeys out in Minoh (where I went, pronounced "Me-No") were pretty mean. Like beat you up and take your lunch kinda mean. Or at least take your lunch kinda mean. They also are quite advanced, or so I was told. This can be seen in their ability to purchase soda and tea (for other drink options see last post) from the vending machines (like I said, back to nature). However as of late they have not been able to use the vending machines due to the increase in charge from ¥100 to ¥120; their little monkey paws can't hold the three coins. The local UMWoJ (United Monkey Workers of Japan) as been in talks with the vending people in an attempt to gain some limited choices of ¥100 drinks, but to no avail.
So yeah, this last weekend I went out and looked at maple tree leaves and monkeys while surrounded by people half my size...honestly it felt I was on Monkey mountain now that I think about it....and in the end we came upon a wonderful waterfall. It honestly was very beautiful and it was nice to get out and see some seasonal wonders. I am sorry, but I don't have any pictures of the waterfall, my battery died in my camera before we got there. I do have this lovely shot.

You can see a bit of the waterfall through the trees. I hope to go back this winter and hopefully will see more monkeys and take more pictures so that your jealousy can be complete.
I just remembered that I was supposed to talk about aesthetics today. I also see that I have failed at this task. I think I can handle this by simply ignoring the fact once again.
So did I mention that they also happened to sell momiji-tempura on the road to this waterfall? I am sure that most of you are familiar with tempura? As someone from Rockford, Il. may inform you, "It's the name o'the batter that's on the shit you get at Happy Wok". Good! You guessed it. "Momiji" means Maple leaf...so yeah, put those together and what do you get? A snack fit for a fat kid at a carnival. Really, breaded and deep fried maple leaves...did I buy some? You bet your buttocks I did. "Were they delicious?" You may press, and in my best Socratic method I would reply, "Didn't I say they were deep fried?"
They look like this (with a bottle of Shochu, now an all season tradition in my home):


Well folks I grow tired. This weekend I am going to go to Nara to crank my neck some more in city parks while gazing at the wonderful fall colors. I will also be feeding and trying to ride some tame deer at Nara Park. I will charge the battery a little longer so that I can have more pictures for you next time...and possibly less words.
Take care and have a happy Thanksgiving...I hope that your center piece is aesthetically pleasing. Nothing worse then gorging yourself while having to stare at dead or dried flowers. Especially when they are in one of those ram's horn looking wicker things...why do I have the feeling I just offended a family member?

Got any Corn?

As the weather continually declines over here in ole Nippon I begin to find myself looking for new and interesting drinks to warm myself up with. No, I am not talking about alcohol, that stuff actually doesn't warm you up at all but instead can be more harmful in cold weather...however, hot toddies can be delightful!
Anyway, on with the strange drink selections.
So you see over here sodas, or pops, or whatever you want to call them, are not very popular. Now there are such things as coke and pepsi and diet colas, but there are not such things as mountain dew or sprite. There are however Japanese versions of non-colas such as Mitsuya cider (which tastes nothing like I thought cider was supposed to taste like).
To clarify: the drinks are not like the United States. No syrupy sodas and no flavorful combinations (if you need an example think about the many concoctions that Mountain Dew has thought up in the past few years).
This however does not leave the drinks to be unworthy of sampling; quite the opposite. I obviously can not always read the label so I am often surprised when I make such a purchase. It is fun and somewhat exciting and a great thing to do while waiting for a train.
Now most folks with half a brain would say that it's not too hard to determine if something is a tea (which makes up about 45% of the drink options), coffee (another gimmie really, and about another 45%), vitamin drinks (such as "1000 Lemons" which tastes nothing like lemon consentrate but more like...well I don't know, but lemon concentrate would just not be palatable...just think about the acidity of such a thing..not to mention the morning after factor. That would burn...reminds me of the one time I ate a whole pineapple...ouch) vitamin drinks also include the infamous "Genke" drinks (pronounced: gay-n-key; this being japanese for excited, or healthy, or happy...however in drink form this word means wired, or so I've been led to believe...they are pretty harmless and don't have the heart racing effect of red bull). Vitamin drinks about 4.5% and soda making up another 4.5%. So you may be asking yourself, "well Dan you cheeky little monkey, where's the other 1%?" Well my friends I don't really know if any my percentages are anywhere near correct, but I will say that if I had my way that last one percent would have to be given to the canned corn market share. Oh you read it right. From the country that loves to put corn in any and all ackward positions comes corn in a can...that you can buy out of a vending machine...warm as well...and not just *ching* 20 seconds in the microwave warm, but "ya gotta sip it so as ya don't burn your mouth" kinda warm.
Isn't that awesome?!?!
It's just like the creamed corn that mom used to cook (probably the repackeged surplus to be honest). It is tasty and definately a much needed treat for those standing on the cold train platform waiting for the ole 17:02 to Kyoto Express...whilst sick, either the bottle or the natural kind. It is delicious and I think that we need to press for more of these kind of things both at home and abroad. You want to spread happiness to all the little children of the world? Send 'em a can of Knorr's warmed (creamed) corn (soup)...don't know which it is supposed to be.
So in effect, it may only take up 1% of the vending machine possibilities...it makes up 100% of the warm and happy thoughts in this man's head as he waits for that train.
Soothes the throat too!

Now for today's picture...

Geez you'd think that I opened up an online deli with all that meat...but honestly, I'd rather leave that to the professional.
Well have a good one and I bid you ado.
Love you mom!

books, books the magical fruit...

So the other day I was thinking that my problem with this thing is that I always think too much. You know what I mean? Didn't think so. Okay, so my problem is that I always feel that I have to have something really interesting or deep to say (re: two posts ago) but then when I look at other peoples blogs I realize that the whole reason for the blog is just to put a little bit of yourself out there for mass consumption. When I first started this thing I had a lot to talk about, a whole new world if you will. But now that the luster has faded and I have assimilated I have not a word to say. So I shall now delve into my everyday life. However I will not be discussing my work life in this post, but moreover how I entertain myself over here; which is either through t.v./movies or through books.
Let's start with the t.v. thing.
So lately I have to admit that I have an addiction to 24. I never really watched the show in the states, but I have to admit that I would have if I knew what I know now. It is an amazing show. Although it's politics are a little right wing and a lot of the action is impossible (side note: if it were a regular movie then the impossibilities could be overlooked, but it is a show that prides itself for being shot in "real-time" which means that the actual time line is actual...ummm, don't know if that makes sense, but I'll stick with it and simply regard you ((the confused reader)) as a kind idiot). But after those two shortcomings I have to admit that I often find myself staying up too late yelling at the t.v. and cheering as Jack Bauer (played by Kieffer "I overcame Lost Boys and lets not mention Flatliners" Sutherland pulls off the amazing. Good stuff my friends and family.
Next we have The Sopranos. Now I don't really want to talk about this show, because we all know it, I'm just a late bloomer. But it's good. So check it out: the real reason that I like it is because it was the first .avi file that I discovered my new DVD player could play. Now let me explain. For my birthday some of my friends over here pitched in and bought me a new DVD player that plays all region DVD's as well as some computer files. The reason this is awesome: everyone and there brother (but me) can download tv shows onto their computer and burn copies, and now I can borrow this discs and watch them on my tv instead of tiny computer screen. I'm happy about it...see what happens when I disregard the idea of wanting to say important things on this here thingie, you get garbage about my DVD player (which is awesome) and tv shows that you have already seen...at least four years ago.

At this time I would like to move onto books:
Just read "Wampeters, Foma and Granfalloons" by Kurt Vonnegut (sorry if the title is misspelled...I think that I mispelled misspelled there as well. I need an editor, Brian you got a job?...)
It was good. It was the second collection of his stuff that I have read while living over here. It has made me realize that I really would love to hear him speak publicly...at least twenty years ago when he was doing it more regularly. I saw him on the Daly Show and was a little disappointed, and then I realized how old he was and was able to forgive him.
If you have never read Kurt Vonnegut then I feel that you should get off of your lazy ass and pick up one of his books. And when you do do this you sloth of a person, be sure to take it with a grain of salt. He is a science fiction writer after all.
I have also been reading a lot of Haruki Murikami. He is Japanese and his books are strange at times. But he is a genius and I would have loved to read him outside of this country (I am trying to say that it isn't the fact that I am living here that makes his words poignant...he is just an amazing writer). I would suggest "The Wind Up Bird Chronicles" or "Kafka on the Shore" or "Hard Boiled Wonderland at the End of the Rainbow". Each was delightful.
Currently (as in I am on page two of the introduction) I am reading "A History of Twentieth Century Russia". Don't know why, but it's a happenin'.
I want to end this pointless post by simply asking: did I do okay? Would you like to read more of this kind of material? Because I am pretty sure that I could update just about everyday with this kind of crap. Really it wouldn't be a problem.
And I would also like to say that I am sorry to all of my high school and college professors: I know that it isn't fair that I sat in your classes year after year not having read the material while spewing out BS and now that you are done with me I'm reading so much. Would you like me to stop? Should I do that for you? Honestly though, sorry.