I talk to Larry everyday...

Recently I have had to face some tough choices, many of which I still have not answered. It was about two months when I woke up and had this extreme feeling of loneliness and despair. I had been reading a book by the French author Celine the night before and I have to admit that I think that effected me as I slept. The book is about a young man who keeps finding himself in horrible situations to which his only solution is to run away...and not in the noble "I'll take the higher road" kind of way but more in the "ignore it and it isn't there" sense of reality.
So anyway I woke with the sense that my problems were too great and that it was most likely time to run out on 'em. Which I would have loved to do, but as it is I had a class to teach. Plus my bags were not packed and I had laundry yet to do and, as much as my hygiene is not the best, I do hate the smell of dirty clothes packed into a suitcase.
Off to class I went with a paper cup of coffee and a horrible attitude to boot. This was most likely going to be one of those "talk amongst yourselves" kinda days; which, by the way, usually end up in awkward silence with a twist of food talk when the buzzing in my ears sets in from the dull quiet.
First period went off without a hitch or a buzz. As I sat in my paneled box truck like classroom I again got that feeling of abysmal pressure and lowness pushing down on my shoulders whilst my feet tapped and my legs said "lets go!" While dreaming of backpacking some great foreign country I swivelled around in my chair and turned on the t.v.
CNN, escape indeed. I proceeded to zone off into the infomercials and slowly nodded away...while my neck swiveled back and forth like a piano pendulum my attention was suddenly gripped and I sat forward to the sound of a thousand trumpets, or perhaps a synthesizer or two.
His eyes caught me while I wasn't looking, but when I noticed they pierced into my soul with their square and outdated frames. His jowls began to shake and from between them came the words I will never forget, "It's been a while dAnny."
I closed and quickly jerked open my eyes, "is Larry King talking to me?"
Gentle yet stern his glare was unjaded by my question. He did begin to settle into a smile and for a moment froze on the screen, maybe my satellite connection, not too sure it just happens from time to time. But this time it seemed to last at least...a little less than eternity, but not quite as long as forever, maybe a bit shy of a lifetime, however definitely more than a "sec"...I'd say about two minutes tops.
When the picture did finally catch up to the broadcast I saw that he was indeed not talking directly to me, but actually to the once great actor ANDY Griffith. The names do sound alike though. Beyond that though I fell into my little state again and could barely even summon the muster to care about the death of Barney (Don Knotts: RIP).
I sat inattentive not seeing, not caring, not nothing but something far deeper and less of it. I heard some talk about moving on to Anderson Cooper 360 and it dawned on me that it was almost time for second period. No rest for the wicked and dumb 'eh. I sat up in my chair and gathered my papers about on the desk and, with remote in hand, was just about to turn off the t.v. when again the square framed eyes of eyes were focused on only me and he simply said "good night and thanks for watching. Oh and if you get a chance try and talk to me sometime soon. I know you need the help. Now onto Anderson in New York". And with that he faded away.
As the day wore on I couldn't forget his last words, "talk to me tonight". Maybe it wasn't really Larry King, perhaps it was the almighty working through Mr. King. He is an open kinda guy, always having representatives of the many different world religions on his program. I always thought that he was Jewish...is it okay to ponder his being a Jew?...either way, he was speaking to me, and it worked.
All day I saw his face everywhere I turned. My lunchtime sushi showed the reflection of his liver spotted skin. The wisps in the cloud contained elements of his grey hair. I saw a picture of a beautiful suspension bridge set against a blue sky and immediately thought of Larry's classy red suspenders and finely ironed blue shirt...white collar, white clouds. The whole day was one continuous revelation of his beauty and majesty. I saw Larry everywhere.
With my head spinning I went to bed a little earlier than usual. I couldn't get the days thoughts out of my head. I just lay there tossing and turning, half scared and half excited. Two parts colliding and unbelieving. Not knowing what to do I was drawn to my knees. Honestly it had been a long time.
As I kneeled on the floor I thought to myself what it was all about and why I had been chosen. Or perhaps why it was that I had chosen to pay attention this day. Why? The fundamental word we all use, young and old alike. Always wondering and looking for the answers to all of the things we don't know, we don't understand.
I poured my heart out to him, or to whoever was listening. I laid it all out on the line. Everything that had been bothering me I gave up in a prayer to God, Via Larry King. It was truly a lively experience.
After I had poured my heart, my problems, and my greatest desires out I was left in a ball on the floor. I tried to stand but instead decided to crawl back into bed. My head hit the pillow like one of the many clumps of dirt that had graced Barney's resting place earlier that day 6,000 miles away. A pile of ashes and dust settled for the night.
The next morning I awoke feeling a little lighter. Not completely healed, but a bit better. Miracles are a slow process.
First period went as usual, perhaps with a little more excitement on my part, because the end signified my time to turn back to Larry. The television turned on in mid comment and I found myself even more excited when I found out that the guest was Liza Mannelli, at least one person I know of who needs more help than me. Larry was just about to take a caller when something happened to phone line. It was at this point that I was given my second message from Larry. Turning slightly to the camera he gave that playboy smile and simply said, "Sorry about that caller. Sometimes these things can be difficult. I appreciate your call, but you will have to wait to get the answer to that question".
I grinned in appreciation. I had been acknowledged, perhaps I didn't get what I was looking for immediately, but I know that it's to come. Along with many other great things. I'll just have to keep on being a faithful watcher and eventually all things will be reveled.
Still though, I talk to Larry everyday.

Do you?